How Not to Be a Ride Mooch

How Not to Be a “Ride Mooch”

Considering I have only driven my car once for 25 miles in the last 3.5 weeks I would still consider myself carless. That gives me the authority to continue writing about the idiosyncrasies being carless.

I ride my bike most everywhere I go. Still, there are times when a bike is just not possible. For those times I need to call someone for a ride. One of my greatest concerns about being carless is becoming a “mooch.” A mooch, by definition, is someone that takes without giving back.

One of the first days of this experiment it was pouring rain; I had to get a ride from a coworker. Since she lives close to me I had let her know in advance that I might be asking for the occasional ride. She said, of course, that would be fine.

It was humbling to actually take her up on it. There is that nagging feeling that I’m a burden. I feel as if I am breaking into her normal pattern.

In November I will be facilitating some training sessions in Hershey (eight miles from work). It’s an easy ride, but I don’t want to take too much of my work day to gear up and ride. So I might have to borrow a company vehicle. My boss offered to drive me and he could take care of business while he’s there.

My girlfriend lives thirty miles from me. That means when we want to see each other she typically has to drive to me. Of course, I make up for it with food and sometimes gas money.

It’s just a pervasive feeling. It seems as if I am gaining a reputation of being a nuisance. It could be in my head, but it seems real.

How can I overcome this perception?

Help Fill Their Tank

I mentioned before that I am budgeting $30/mo to give to people that give me rides. I see this as one of the most effective ways to not become a mooch. Having a few dollars budgeted to give to those that drive me is a small way of showing people that I am not trying to take advantage of them.

Also, depending on the level they allow you to use thier car or drive you you could offer to take care of all of their oil changes or buy every third tank of gas.

Exchange Services

Another way to not become a burden to your fellow drivers is to exchange services. A guy that I know pretty well moved in two doors down. Two weeks ago he gave me a ride. As we got to talking he said he needed a website. I offered to make his website in exchange for being able to use his car or for rides.

Switch it Up

Have a few alternatives and vary when you call for a ride. There are actually three coworkers that live in my town. I haven’t asked the other two if they can give me occasional rides yet, but I will. This way every time it rains or snows I can call someone different.

Find the Willing

I came across a post on Craigslist. This person offers to give people rides. His daily commute home from work goes straight through my town to my girlfriend’s town. There are quite a few rideshare sites. Sometimes people have moved and will pay you to drive their car to the new home and things like that. If you are simply creative you can usually find people that are offering you their car.

Meet Half Way

Harrisburg’s bus system goes to Dillsburg and Shippensburg. Both of these towns are more than half way to towns I go to frequently. Dillsburg is halfway to some of my best friends. Shippensburg is 2/3 of the way to my parents. The buses only run during rush hours on weekdays, but if I needed to I could take the bus. Your ride would still need to make an effort to get you, but this is a way to take some of the strain off of them. Harrisburg’s buses don’t allow you to take your bike, so that makes things a bit more complicated.

Another method is to rent a car and visit those that often drive to pick you up. You get bonus points if you surprise them. They are so used to getting you that it is a nice break for them to see you without having to pick you up.

Be Grateful

Another simple way to avoid being perceived as a mooch is to simply be grateful. I have found that thanking someone goes a long way. People want to be appreciated, and if they go out of their way to give you a ride the should be.

Watch Your Mouth

I don’t mean don’t swear in some one’s car. Although that’s probably a good idea too. I have found that the words you use will significantly change a person’s attitude towards giving you a ride. It may be subliminal, but if you say “mooch” or “bum” the person will begin to think of you as a bum. Say something like, “Can I share a ride with you?” or “Can I come along on the adventure with you?” This may go hand-in-hand with being grateful, but having a positive spin on it helps the other person feel better about giving you a ride when you text at 7:30 am asking them to come out of their way for you.

Do you find that being a mooch is even an issue? What are some ways you avoid being a mooch?

Share and Enjoy:

October 8, 2008

Tags: alternative transportation, carless, going carless, mooch, ride mooch

Musings of a Quitter, Tips to quitters, Unexpected Challenges | Going Carless

24 Comments

By robert, October 8, 2008 @ 6:03 pm

You need to stop asking for rides just because its raining. That is part of the experience of being car free…….finding out you enjoy the weather. The rain is not going to hurt you and in fact it is fun. Get some waterproof panniers to keep some dry clothes in and ride. You will find yourself smiling all the way to work.

Other tips would be to buy a trailer for groceries etc and rent a car on the weekend if you feel the need to go to the GF. Of course I would ride to your girlfriends but I understand how 60 miles round trip might be tough for a beginner.

Having the right equipment and fitness (takes time) will make all the difference.

[Reply]
Going Carless Reply:
October 9th, 2008 at 9:53 am
Hey Robert,
I aspire to be as die-hard as you. I’m sure as I get worn in things like rain and 30 miles won’t even phase me.

[Reply]
steve Reply:
October 10th, 2008 at 1:01 pm
Get a rain cape (the carradice one) for biking. The keep the rain not only off your body but off your legs.

Also, put fenders on your bike and cut a rainflap that hangs to within one inch of the pavement and bolt it to the front fender and your feet won’t get wet.

When you have your bike equipped like that you will not believe how much different it is to ride in the rain. Most bikes are not set up for practical use, so there are not a lot of examples out there and you wouldn’t necessarily think of it.

For fenders and a rainflap you are looking at $60. (50 for the fenders, 4 for the stair tread to cut the flap from)

For a cape, add another 70 bucks.

Or just use whatever jacket you have but take a change of clothes and shoes with you in a plastic garbage bag.

good luck

[Reply]
Going Carless Reply:
October 10th, 2008 at 1:42 pm
I have a rear fender. I broke the front one off putting my bike in my car (back when I drove my car).

I have been thinking about a cape. Typically the way I work is, do what I’m doing until something pisses me off enough to change. So I’ll try with what I have. If my gear doesn’t handle it then I’ll get a cape.

Maybe you could show me a picture of the rainflap…

[Reply]
steve Reply:
October 10th, 2008 at 1:03 pm
I find that rainy weather is actually some of the nicest, most beautiful and magical weather to bike in. You wouldn’t realize it until you get out in it on a properly equipped bike, though. (And, again, properly equipped bikes are pretty rare).

[Reply]
Going Carless Reply:
October 10th, 2008 at 1:43 pm
by properly equipped I’m assuming you mean the fenders, mudflap, etc that you mentioned in your previous comment. Right?

[Reply]
steve Reply:
October 11th, 2008 at 1:01 am
Yeah. By the way, here’s a link to how to make one.

http://www.phred.org/~alex/bikes/fendermudflap.html

Note that I recommend one on the front fender as opposed to the back. The one on the back would only do good to someone following right behind you, while the one on the front keeps the wet stuff off your feet etc.

Make it wide and make it longer than those pictured–It should come within an inch or two inches from the ground.

Skip the weights, they are not necessary.

It sounds like you have those Planet Bike plastic fenders if they broke. SG (German Co.) makes a set of aluminum fenders sheathed in plastic that won’t shatter. Of course, they cost more than the Planet Bike ones, too. German Engineering.

[Reply]
steve Reply:
October 11th, 2008 at 1:34 am
I meant SKS Fenders.

i would proudly send a photo of mine, except I don’t own a digital camera!

Going Carless Reply:
October 11th, 2008 at 10:54 am
I meant SKS fenders too. I had ones that don’t come off. When I was putting my bike in my car the front one broke off. I still have the rear one on though…I’ve been meaning to get a new front one. I’m going to get a removable one…

Going Carless Reply:
October 11th, 2008 at 10:55 am
Thanks for the info!

Yeah, the fenders are the hard plastic. I’m gonna need some removable ones…

Going Carless Reply:
October 11th, 2008 at 11:01 am
Ahh..I checked out the link. My SKS fender actually has a mud flap on it already. It doesn’t hang down like that, but it sticks out on the back of the rear fender…

I can’t find my exact set online anywhere. They either both have a mud flap or neither have a mud flap. When I bought mine only the rear one did. Here’s an image of my rear fender.

http://www.bikesonline.com/SKS-Commuter-Fender-Set-Black-60mm.htm

steve Reply:
October 11th, 2008 at 12:04 pm
I looked at the picture. It looks like that black one is hard plastic.

The ones I have are the silvery ones. They are aluminum sandwiched between plastic and will not shatter/break.

What I’m saying is, hard plastic is even more likely to break in the winter.

SKS makes some that are laminated aluminum and plastic that will last and last.

Any mud flap on any fender you can buy (that I’ve seen) is relatively useless. You can remove the ones they come with and put one that actually works on, that hang to the ground.
By robert, October 9, 2008 @ 2:21 pm

Its a slow progression…….like alzheimer’s

Most folks start off riding recreationally on trails, then sometimes they ride recreationally on the roads…..then some *might* try commuting somewhere by bike when the weather is perfect. Then they slowly progress into a few of us who decide to ditch the car and wonder why they ever rode in one to begin with.

Its 10 times harder for you just jumping in with both feet without much equipment etc. I commend you.

[Reply]
Going Carless Reply:
October 9th, 2008 at 3:26 pm
Well, I did have a LITTLE equipment. I’ve been riding since May, but yeah, I did jump right in. I read somebody say, “there’s no bad weather. Only bad gear.” I think that makes sense.

In the meantime, I’ll continue to write about my experience.

[Reply]
Going Carless Reply:
October 9th, 2008 at 3:59 pm
Also, I’m not sure if you’re the same robert that is replying with greenteammow@yahoo.com, but I assume you are. I sent you an email to that email address with some questions about your lawn care business. I’m very interested in starting one.

[Reply]
Jason B Reply:
October 10th, 2008 at 8:38 am
Whoa - PRO TIP: Don’t leave this email up for bots to snag and spam!

[Reply]
Going Carless Reply:
October 10th, 2008 at 8:48 am
I hear you on that, but he leaves it in the hyperlink within his name. It can still grab it there.

[Reply]
Jason B Reply:
October 10th, 2008 at 9:31 am
Hmm none of his “names” are clickable for me. Are you sure it isn’t only viewable for you, logged in as the site owner?

Going Carless Reply:
October 10th, 2008 at 11:06 am
Yeah, I checked the source. The email addresses are replaced with their database ID # in the source. So yes, thanks for the tip.
By Pam, October 9, 2008 @ 4:06 pm

Crazy Robert and Green Team Robert are one in the same!
Pam´s last blog post..I get tired of seeing this

[Reply]
By steve, October 10, 2008 @ 12:46 pm

Don’t think of it as mooching, think of it as cooperation, helpfulness, friendliness and ridesharing.

keep some change envelopes at home and an assortment of small bills and change. Make up a chart of distance and gas costs for the average car and use it to fill an envelope with the right amount of cash for the ride (My car costs 13 cents per mile to drive gaswise–others might cost more).

Once getting in the person’s car, right away and upfront I would just say “thanks for sharing the ride with me!” and say: I figured it out 8 miles at 30mpg (or whatever) is about 80 cents (or whatever)”. And hand them a change envelope with the cash.” If they demur say, “That’s kind of you, but I make it a policy of splitting the gas costs –I’d really feel better if you take it.” And say it with a smile.

then change the subject.

They might initially say they don’t want the money, but believe me they actually would prefer to have it, they just don’t want to seem cheap.

Plus getting the cash might make them think that sharing a ride will not only feel good (as a favor) but be financially helpful in a small way to them. They will feel vastly more positive about helping you out in the future since you are being politely considerate and financially fair. And you will not be in the “mooch” category at all since it will be a fair exchange and at no point did you make them feel “cheap” by requiring them to ask for the cash. Doing it at the beginning of the ride sets the tone. You can even explain it before the ride if you want when you make the arrangements.

[Reply]
Going Carless Reply:
October 10th, 2008 at 1:39 pm
That’s great advice. I especially like the up front thing. I think that’s a great way to handle it.

[Reply]
By yaya, June 18, 2009 @ 8:34 pm

Hi,

I really like your tips. I just wanted to add to Steve, you should pay more than just gas if you’re always mooching off the same person, and it’s out of their way. This happens to me a lot: I have the only car out of my group of 4 friends, and I always have to drive them around. Sometimes they give me a few bucks for gas, but I’m really starting to resent it because oil changes, maintenance, etc are all really expensive, and my car actually costs more like 40c per mile to drive! We are all graduate students and all make the exact same amount of money, so I’m not more well-off than them or anything: I just chose to own a car for my other activities, but somehow ended up being the group chauffeur. I wish they would see your post. I can’t drop them because they’re good friends otherwise, but I wish I could make them see how expensive it is to own a car that they use all the time…

[Reply]